{"id":8486,"date":"2024-06-20T12:49:15","date_gmt":"2024-06-20T12:49:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/involvement.co.ke\/?p=8486"},"modified":"2024-06-20T12:49:15","modified_gmt":"2024-06-20T12:49:15","slug":"just-how-i-feel-sometimes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/2024\/06\/20\/just-how-i-feel-sometimes\/","title":{"rendered":"I Know I Shouldn’t"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Ben Ayuko<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

{image by Cornell Chronicle}<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I feel like if I, acknowledge the past<\/p>\n

it means that it happened, that it will out last<\/p>\n

If I were to hide, from it in a pit<\/p>\n

It wouldn’t have meaning, nothing to admit<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But who it affected, would not just abide<\/p>\n

from out the woodwork, they’d emerge alive<\/p>\n

to keep me accounted, counting my sins<\/p>\n

making me witness, again and again<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

If I were to ask, forgiveness from they<\/p>\n

I would be admitting to my past mistakes<\/p>\n

and that would mean, indeed they were right<\/p>\n

how could I sleep with myself tonight<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

No, I know better, planned it out well<\/p>\n

I’ll take them out, to dine and to dwell<\/p>\n

a wonderful night, out in the city<\/p>\n

with banter to laugh at, funny and witty<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Till it’s getting late, so get in the car<\/p>\n

I’ll drive them home, ill drive them far<\/p>\n

I’ll take them where, they can’t see no human<\/p>\n

I’ll take them there because they know too much<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bury them deep, right next to my secrets<\/p>\n

With skeletons rotten and they’re holding them dearest<\/p>\n

And now I can act, like it didn’t happen<\/p>\n

Back of my mind, where they must reside in<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Ben Ayuko {image by Cornell Chronicle}   I feel like if I, acknowledge the past it means that it happened, that it will out last If I were to hide, from it in a pit It wouldn’t have meaning, nothing to admit   But who it affected, would not just abide from out the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":8487,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[46],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8486","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-poems"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8486","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8486"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8486\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8486"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8486"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/invo.nyarango.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8486"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}