By Pauline Nzamulya
{image by RoommateFromHell}
Cicilia Wambui was full of excitement as she escorted her firstborn daughter, Esther, through the gates of Daystar University.
Esther had scored a straight As and was looking forward to joining the university to do the course of her choice, law. She had dreamed of being a lawyer ever since she was in primary school. However, neither Esther, nor her mother, had a hint of what awaited her in the hostel where she was soon to be assigned.
Like Esther, many teenagers who successfully completed their Form Four examinations and received placement in various colleges and universities through the Kenya Universities and Colleges Central Placement Service (KUCCPS) were often unprepared for what they encountered in hostels. According to statistics from KUCCPS, 153,274 students who sat their Kenya Certificate of Secondary Education (KCSE) have been placed in 70 universities for various degree programs. Additionally, 19,653 students were placed in 88 Kenya Medical Training Colleges (KMTCs), and others in 35 teacher training colleges and various Technical and Vocational Education and Training (TVET) institutions.
Unlike hostels in public universities where students are crowded in rooms that have barely any level of comfort, private universities’ hostels, such as Daystar University, are physically attractive, well painted, and well-placed in a serene environment. The cubes are designed for 2-4 occupants and often have hot showers. They resemble what one would find in a 3–4-star hotel.
For Esther, the feeling that comes with moving into a newly leased apartment is one of the moments that fills her with a lot of expectations and optimism.
At last, she had got the opportunity to fly on her own wings and feel the taste of freedom, away from the watchful gaze of her mother. The aura of being independent left her energized to face the future with confidence. New faces, new encounters, and a new beginning to her life.
The first time she interacted with her roommate, whom she wishes to simply call Zinhle, she found her to be friendly and approachable. Zinhle was a jovial lady who rarely looked unhappy, which made it difficult to resist her charms. Little did she know that behind that pretty face there was a hurricane that was about to come into her life and destroy everything she held dear.
To say Esther has always been a neat girl would be a bit of an understatement. In fact, in 11years at her primary boarding school, she had on more than one occasion, won the ‘cleanest pupil award‘ specifically, for her neatness. Therefore, when she encountered the outrageous clutter that awaited her in her new room, she knew she would need every ounce of experience she’d earned in that 11 years to survive what was to come. Clothing, shoes, accessories…Zinhle was not afraid to strew them all over their small space, as though she was trying to cover up a huge secret written all over the floor.
She tried to be understanding at first. Everyone has a major adjustment throughout college, don’t they?
“Zinhle, do you think we could maybe keep our stuff on our own sides of the room?” Esther proposed one day, after carefully stepping across the mountain of Zinhle’s stuff that was invading her side of the room.
“Certainly! This weekend, I’ll tidy up,” she assured Esther with a radiant smile. The weekend would come and go, and Esther would still be stumbling over shoes, struggling through a sea of clothes, and looking for her personal belongings lost in the clutter.
The noise was worse than the mess, if that makes any sense. Zinhle seemed to have an obsessive social life. Their room became a makeshift nightclub every night. Laughter would travel through the walls, music would blast, and friends would come in till the wee hours of the following day. Time and again, Esther begged her roommate for silence, but to no avail. It was getting on her nerves, and she wondered how long she could continue pretending to be good with Zinhle.
“Tomorrow is my midterm examination, Zinhle. Can we maintain this evening?” She begged her roommate one night, attempting to hide her despair.
“Oh, sure! We’ll go to the common room,” she said, comfortingly. An hour later and the music was on again, and the only place Esther could study for the exam was the bathroom.
When she woke up one morning, Zinhle was on her laptop without her approval.
“Zinhle, what are you doing?” She asked, attempting to maintain a steady tone.
“Oh, I just wanted to quickly double-check something. I hope it’s okay with you,” she said, casually, not even raising her gaze. Although Esther felt like her privacy had been breached, Zinhle’s casual demeanor made her wonder if she was exaggerating.
It was not just her laptop. Esther’s clothing would, soon, start to mysteriously wind up in Zinhle’s washing basket. Her food would mysteriously disappear from the refrigerator and her new makeup would unexpectedly…mysteriously run out. It felt so absurd to confront her. She would brush it off with a giggle, her charisma protecting her from any true responsibility.
The final blow was finding the room destroyed when she got back from a weekend trip. There were food wrappers, empty bottles, and dirty dishes all over the place; all accompanied by the most pungent of stenches. And Zinhle just lay there, totally unbothered, amid the chaos.
“Zinhle, this is overboard. You simply can’t carry on in this manner!” Esther finally let out all her rage that had been building for months.
“Calm down Esther, there’s only a small mess,” Zinhle answered, rolling her eyes. “I’ll clean it up.”
However, Esther had heard this before. She knew that unless she took drastic action, the mess and noise would persist, and her sanity would, slowly, be eroded away.
Esther was at her breaking point and in desperate need of assistance. She was out of options. The only thing left to do, was to consult the hostel’s resident assistant (RA). Of course, she had heard that ‘snitches get stitches’ but, after careful consideration, she deduced that the stitches may be worth it. Determined, she went to the RA and detailed the events that had transpired, including the clutter, the disturbance, and the privacy violation. The RA empathized with her and consented to mediate.
It was a heated session. Ever the charmer, Zinhle, played down her actions, making Esther look like a crazy, tidy weirdo. However, the RA saw through her behavior and established new guidelines that emphasized the value of thoughtfulness and respect for one another.
Even though things got better afterward, Zinhle and Esther were obviously not suited for each other. Esther tried to avoid being in the room as much as possible, taking comfort in the library and, occasionally, some of her other acquaintances’ rooms. At the completion of the term, Esther was able to apply for a room change.
Relocating was like a prison sentence being lifted. All the things Zinhle was not, her new roommate was. Tidy, calm, respectful…name it. Her emotional state and academic achievement soon improved because of the striking difference.
Grace, a student at Kenyatta University, shares her experience: “My first roommate was very noisy, she used to entertain her guests into the night, at times I could not even sleep or study for my classes and I started performing so poorly.”
James, from Jomo Kenyatta University of Agriculture and Technology (JKUAT) adds: “Each time we shared a room in our house, he was so untidy. Things were always scattered, and there was always an awful stench emanating from wherever he had just sat or stood until he moved out of my house.”
From the University of Nairobi, Catherine remarks, “It is very typical to hear about friction between roommates, with the most frequent complaints being about noise and cleanliness. Many students change their roommates or leave shared apartments by mid of the first semester.”
Joy, a student at Strathmore University, notes: “In private universities, things are considerably better because there are proper facilities provided. But the problems regarding roommates remain the same. Some people simply don’t know how to respect others’ property, and this leads to tension.”
According to Peter, an RA at Moi University: “Many students report conflicts with their roommate due to noise level, hygiene, and privacy invasion almost every week with a suggestion to change rooms if the arguments cannot be resolved amicably. Freshmen are mostly affected by this due to transition to new living environments with strangers.”
It will push you to your limits and teach you priceless lessons about respecting yourself and setting boundaries if you manage to survive a roommate from hell. Even though Esther’s semester with Zinhle was a nightmare, she emerged from it stronger and with a deeper respect for a peaceful house.
Never forget that seeking assistance, advocating for yourself, and prioritizing your health are all acceptable actions if you ever find yourself in a similar circumstance. Remembering that there is still hope is the most important thing to do.
END.